Friday: Was at "The Park" grinding, trying to make my mama proud on the felt. I ended up a little. Saturday and Sunday went so horribly that I don't remember one single hand from Friday. I had to leave to go bowling and bowling I did. Horribly. I was with Diablos and we made a bet where whoever bowled the furthest away from their estimated score had to do two shots (on top of the drinking that we were already doing). Of course I guessed 150 and bowled a 123. Luckily she guessed 127 and bowled a 100 so we tied. Second game I bowled like 113 and lost by a landslide. Not only did I lose but she bowled 154 so she kicked my ass. After that we drank at the bar. Then she beat me in pool.
The bowling alley definitely has some notable features:
(1) Dance Dance Revolution (I think that's the name): There are kids, ranging from five years old to 45 years old that play this game all night long. Seriously, these techno dancing bastards must pump like $85 into this machine every time they go. Not to mention they either look like (a) gothic emos, (b) the fat kid from Goonies or (c) child molestors. All mixed together playing the same video game. All night. Working up ridiculous sweats tossing quarters into a machine that is playing Madonna over a techno beat displaying flashing pink arrows directing you where to put your foot. I mean can you imagine if our society is somehow judged based on this game? Say you are a historian in 2000 years and you discover Dance Dance Revolution. How do you try to explain that?
(2) Fat Lesbians: I have nothing against lesbians. Or fat people. At all. So I'm faded (Faaaaaded) and I decide I'm going to dedicate some songs on the juke box to Diablos as a joke. I go to pick the songs out (Johnny Cash, Luther Van Dross and can't remember the third) and when I get back some fat chick is sitting next to her dripping game all in her left ear. As soon as I show up she leaves, obviously embarrassed. Diablos explains that the chick was hitting on her or whatever. Then Diablos goes to the bathroom and the chick follows her. That's not the funny part. The funny part is that there are two other fat chicks sitting at the bar talking to two OTHER fat chicks that had been bowling next to us. The two that were bowling next to us are extremely drunk. The two at the bar start BRAGGING about how they found each other on Myspace. As if I wasn't already weirded out by that, the other two shout in excitement because they ALSO found each other on Myspace. Wow, what a small world this is. All the fat lesbians are hooking up on Myspace. So if you know any, you might want to let them know. For some reason I've never seen the forum for fat lesbians but it must be crackin'. Again, I have nothing against lesbians or fat people.
(3) Weird people, period: The bowling alley is just full of weird people. Period. I have never seen as many 85-year-old men with mullets, 25-year-old women with their pants pulled up to their nipples and their turtle necks tucked in or 55-year-old men with high water sweat pants (yes, high water sweat pants do exist) in my life. If you are looking for any of the aforementioned, Mar Vista Lanes on Venice is the place to go.
(4) When you bowl a strike, the screen shows some chick doing a solid forehand stroke in tennis and then it says "STRIKE!". ...the fuck?
Saturday: Saturday was an interesting day at the table. Actually, it sucked. I built my stack to the point where I was about second or third in chips at the table and sitting pretty good at like $600. This other dude comes and sits on my right and is wild as hell. He plays a bunch of horrible hands and gets lucky a bunch of times and quickly runs his stack to like $550 or so. Anyways he had KK with a spade, I had Q8 of clubs, four people in the pot, flop comes Q86 all spades, he bets big, I push over the top, he eventually calls and turns the flush.
Saturday night we went to good old Zanzibar. Ike, myself, the girl I'm talking to and her friend. I was a little worried about having her there and the Zanzibar bartender but it worked out okay cuz I haven't talked to the Zanzibar bartender in a long time and we never even really dated or anything like that. We got drunktastic and headed home. Everything looked like it was gonna work out for Ike and the homegirl until we peer pressured her into smoking the lalala, she immediately made love to the toilet and knocked out. Sorry Ike.
Sunday: I watched the SC/Kansas hoop game. We look good although we didn't finish the game strong. OJ will start taking over these games once he gets comfortable. Then I went to HP and got torched on QQ (me) vs. flush draw all-in and AA (me) vs. KK all-in pre-flop for $900 pot. Great. Sunday night I tried to watch "Little Miss Sunshine" by myself and fell asleep after 30 minutes while they were driving to California. The movie looked funny but obviously wasn't funny enough to keep me awake.
Here are the big hands I was involved in over the weekend. I can't forget my super suckout with 5-2 offsuit. Went like this: Everyone limped, I was in the hi-jack so I limped with 5-2 off. Flop comes 9-5-2. Doc bets, I raise, small blind goes all-in, doc calls, I know I can't be ahead but call the rest of my $100. Hit the 2-outer on the turn. Overall I had one small winning session, one medium losing session and one big losing session = loser.
1 comment:
*looks for fat lesbians on MySpace*
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